Dialectical Exercises and Questions from the Internet.

March 27, 2014

“Why do you stay up all hours of the night?”
I reply, “because night is the time when I feel the least anxious”. My justification for staying up late.

Being just that also makes it feel safe to finally face my disorder. I can complete exercises from the Fulton State DBT Workbook in conjunction with /r/dbtselfhelp.

If you’d like to watch, be my guest. If not, whatevs.

Lesson 1, Exercise 1

A. Identify a time this week when you DID NOT think or act dialectically.
*Briefly describe the situation (Who, what, when)
*How did you think or act in this situation?
*Are you using unhelpful thinking? What were they?
*What is another dialectic belief about the situation?
*What was the outcome?

One morning, I became annoyed because I thought no one helps with chores around the house. I wanted a clean glass but felt too tired to wash the dishes again, which I’ve done more often than not since we moved here.
I said to myself, “Of course, because no one ever helps me around here”.
This thinking was indeed unhelpful, because I am helped with chores sometimes.
The other people in this house do help when they are motivated. Lately they work a lot and may be preoccupied with other thoughts.
I recognized that I was simply irritable, and that I could ask for some help if I need it.

B. Identify a time this week when you DID think or act dialectically.
*Briefly describe the situation (who, what, when)
*How did you act in this situation?
*Did you use unhelpful thinking? What were they?
*Did you identify a dialectical belief about the situation?
*What was the outcome?

Yesterday, a friend complained to me that another friend had an attitude with her over texts because she used all caps for some words.
I read the texts, and while the use of all caps can be construed as attitudinal, I determined that the other friend was only trying to express a more emphatic cadence.
I explained this to my friend, and while she disagreed at first, I remained patient with her and told her that I could see why she thought our other friend’s text came off the wrong way.
I used helpful thinking by seeing things from my friend’s perspective and our other friend’s perspective, noting truth from both sides.
This helped me create a dialectical viewpoint of the situation.
I convinced my friend that the texts meant something else without any conflict.

The Internet Wants to Know

1. White or red wine?
Neither – blush.

2. Have you ever had a crush on a teacher?
I did, and I referred to them as “eye candy”.

3. Have you ever kissed a member of the same sex?

4. Would you rather never fall in love again or never orgasm again?
Trick question: they’re both hell.

5. What does your outfit consist of today?
Black leggings, a black-and-white striped sweater dress, and a black long-sleeved undershirt.

6. What are your bust-waist-hip measurements?
I don’t know, but they’re probably hot.

7. Are you a hypocrite?
About some things, but perhaps without realization or because I haven’t reached an ideal yet.

8. Why did you last cry?
I don’t remember, which is a good thing.

9. What are your favourite smells?
Satya Sai Baba Nag Champa incense (what every head-shop smells like), morning dew, shampooed hair, kitty breath, pheromones, mint, chai tea, flower gardens, fresh laundry, cucumber, jasmine rice, vanilla.

10. What are your favourite textures?
Fur, soft warm skin, silky human hair, hotel bed sheets, carved wood, smooth glass, suede, faux leather.

11. Any beauty tips?
Wash and moisturize your face every single day and night.
Wear sunscreen and drink plenty of water.
Limit binge drinking, reduce or quit smoking.
Creep healthy food into your diet until most of what you eat is healthy.
Brush teeth and use whitening mouthwash twice daily, and floss once daily.
Use lip balm.
Wash your make-up off before sleep.

12. Fuck, Marry, Kill:
Fuck- Mia Kirshner
Marry- John Mulaney
Kill – Tie: Rush Limbaugh, Ann Coulter

13. If you won a LOT of money the lottery and decided to move, where would you move to?
NYC, Chicago, or Toronto.

14. Alcoholic beverage of choice?
Jack & Diet.

15. What is more attractive: Nice hands or nice feet?
I really enjoy nice hands, but having both would be the ultimate.

16. What’s the youngest you would consider dating?
Man: 28
Woman: 24

17. If you were around in the sixties would you be a mod or a rocker?
I’d be reppin’ the Beat Generation.

18. Did you grow up in a healthy environment?
No, but I’m making up for it.

19. What do you think of when I say “the twenties”?
The “roaring twenties” of the twentieth century, or my roaring twenties in the twenty-first century.

20. Could you ever deliver a baby?
I could, but I won’t.

21. Can you ride a bicycle?
Being an incidental hipster, that’s a yes.

22. Paris, London and New York… which one would you live in, which would you visit for a day, which would you visit for a fortnight?
Live – NYC
Visit for a day – Paris
Visit for a fortnight – London

23. Heavy rain or heatwave?
Heavy rain. Both are terrible, but you can’t watch a heatwave (unless you count people dropping dead).

24. How would you murder your victims?
I’d murder them with ironic justice. If my victims are murderers themselves, then they will die the way they killed.

25. What is your biggest unpopular opinion?
That strippers are people too.


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